“I feel so guilty I had the affair. I don’t even know why I did it. What was I thinking? What to do now?
This is a very typical line from men and women who consult me after realising the guilt of having an affair.
The post-affair guilt can be destructive and I understand how difficult it can be to escape the same.
As a relationship counsellor I have worked with thousands of mena and women on both side of the spectrum. When guilt strikes one of the most common emotional turmoils is to fight the feeling dead inside, boredom, a feeling of neglect and communication breakdown.
So, what can you do to get over your guilt and move on with your life?
1. Forgive yourself. – You committed a mistake, you need to improve on it. By beating yourself everyday for the same, you’ll not gain anything. So stand up.. Promise yourself to take charge of your life.
2. Acceptance – If you ever go to an Alcoholic Anonymous meeting, you’ll find them all starting with the tagline “my name is xyz.. I’m an alcoholic”.
Acceptance is very powerful. It also reminds you that you can change. Accept your mistake, but no mistake it big enough to not be rectified.
3. Collaborate, find a neutral knowledgable 3rd person who can help you out.
This is a sign of strength and a sign of willingness to heal the pain called.
Those who don’t seek help, aren’t interested in healing the pain caused, because their trust level is at all time low!
4. There is always a Why? Solve it – Every relationship happens due to a reason. Something that was missing somewhere. Time to work on the Whys?
5. There is always a Reason? Learn from it. – Many times relationships fail. Your partner can never giveup the thought that you cheated him/her. Its time to move on. You might remained married for sake of society, but the bond is broken forever.
There is always a reason for the same. Beyond all the sadness and anger, something is waiting for you!
written by –
Who is Dr.Mittal?
Dr.Mittal is India’s Leading Decision Making Influencer. A revolutionary Psychiatrist who has started new health & lifestyle changing approaches like Coffee Shop Consultation & Whatsapp based Solutions Booster, along with Classical Clinic based Medical Approach.
He has already transformed the life of 20,000 people. Transform Your life, Follow him at OFFICIAL FACEBOOK PAGE
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